"After the End" 

Log line: LAST MAN ON EARTH, EX-WALMART CASHIER, SERIOUS ALCOHOLIC, MUST CONQUER INNER DEMONS, SAVE PREGNANT GIRLFRIEND FROM ALIEN ASSASSIN TO SAVE HUMAN RACE FROM EXTINCTION.

 

 

FIRST THREE SCENES

 

EXT. WALMART PARKING LOT - DAY

 

A Walmart cashier named IVORY BLACKMON -- late 40’s, blonde hair, athletic build except for slight paunch, reeks of unused potential -- emerges from the store. Studying screen of his phone, Ivory doesn’t notice black Cherokee with texting, distracted mother of three behind the wheel.

 

Ivory’s Spidey sense kicks in at last second. He jerks eyes from phone, stops and jumps back just in time to dodge the Cherokee as it rumbles by main entrance of Walmart. He shakes head, glares at retreating SUV, returns to phone, hits CALL button.

 

DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.)

                                            Hey, get your ass over here. Happy hour started a half hour ago. 

 

Ivory zips around a slow-moving, elderly customer pushing a cart load of groceries. He’s almost running for his gray Dodge Intrepid parked in the employee (”associate” in Walmart lingo) parking area.

 

                                                                  IVORY

                                          I just finished my shift. I’ll get there as soon as

                                          humanly possible. What watering hole are you at today?

 

                                                                 DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.)

                                         Shangri-La’s It’s a Chinese place with rice beer 

                                         and kick-ass drinks made from ten different

                                         liquors and minimal mix. 

 

                                                                IVORY

                                        Fuck, that sounds really expensive. I only need two

                                        ingredients in my drinks, nine parts tequila, one part lemon sour.

 

 

                                                               DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.) 

                                        They got that here too.

 

Ivory uses remote key, opens driver’s side door.

 

                                                               IVORY

                                         What’s the address?

 

                                                               DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.)

                                         Sixteen sixty-eight West Third Street.  

 

                                                                IVORY

                                         What the hell, that’s on the other side of the damn city. And

                                        it’s rush fucking hour,  which means no one’s rushing anywhere.

 

                                                               DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.)

                                         Don’t worry, dude. You know how it is. They call it happy

                                         hour but it lasts like four hours. Just get here when you can.

 

Ivory reaches over to IGLOO COOLER that sits on floor on passenger’s side, slides open top, takes out BOTTLE OF 1800 TEQUILA. A MINNESOTA VIKINGS PLASTIC GLASS stands in beverage holder next to steering wheel. He dumps bunch of ICE CUBES into glass.

 

                                                               IVORY

                                         Luckily I have a mobile wet bar. 

 

 

EXT. FREEWAY - NIGHT

 

Six lanes of traffic, three going west, three going east, go nowhere fast. In the middle lane is gray Dodge Intrepid,

 

Ivory fiddles with phone. He dumps more tequila in glass. 

 

He glances to his right, sees a MAN IN BUSINESS SUIT talking on cell phone. On his left, a YOUNG WOMAN IN LOW-CUT TANK TOP and SKIMPY CUT-OFF SHORTS composes text. In car in front of him, two grade-school girls watch “Frozen” on MOUNTED VIDEO MONITOR

 

Ivory returns focus to hot young female on his left. She bends over, reveals more cleavage. Ivory raises his glass.

 

                                                            IVORY

                                               You go, girly.

 

EXT. FREEWAY - NIGHT

 

Six lanes of traffic, still barely moving, Ivory’s still in the middle lane. He’s on the phone.

 

                                                             DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.)

                                                You gotta get here, dude. There’s a table

                                                with three hot, young Asian babes. One just

                                                winked at me.

 

                                                              IVORY

                                               Good for fucking you. I’m surrounded by a legion

                                               of stagnant hunks of metal. 

 

                                                          DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.)

                                               You gotta be getting close.

 

Ivory glances to his right, puts on turning signal.

 

                                                          IVORY

                                               I am. In fact, I need to switch lanes in a second so I’m going to get off the damn phone. Save me a hot young Asian chick, alright? 

              

                                                            DAMIEN SMITH (O.S.)

                                               Consider it done, dude.

 

Ivory has to let next car go ahead of him, then eases into right-hand lane over horned protests from next driver.

 

 

EXT. SIDEWALK ON WEST THIRD STREET - NIGHT

 

Ivory staggers down sidewalk, stops in front of 1686 West Third Street, which is a bookstore four buildings away from the Shangri-La. Thinking it’s the bar where his friends are in, Ivory enters. 

 

INT. UPTOWN BOOK STORE - CONTINUOUS

 

Ivory frowns as he enters the store. Customers study, then pick up books from shelves. Straight ahead of him, a big-chested blonde woman -- AMANDA MONTGOMERY --  shakes hands with a man whose name tag reads JASON GRANITE, MANAGER. She then sticks a leftover copy of her book into a BLACK BACKPACK and turns toward an approaching Ivory. She smiles.              

                       

                                                             AMANDA

                                                I’m  sorry, the book signing just ended.

 

She sees confused, drunken expression on his face.

 

                                                            AMANDA (CONT’D)

                                         But you’re probably not here for that, are you?

 

                                                            IVORY

                                         No, I’m supposed to meet a couple buddies at the Shangri-La.

 

                                                            AMANDA

                                        Oh yes, that’s just down the block from here, four or

                                       five buildings (points to her right) that way.

 

Ivory checks the note pad on his phone.

 

                                                           IVORY

                                         Isn’t this Sixteen eighty-six West Third Street?

 

                                                          AMANDA

                                         No, it’s Sixteen sixty-eight West Third.

 

It takes Ivory a couple of seconds. He slaps his forehead, rolls his eyes.

                                                       

                                                          IVORY

                                         Alright, I’m a little lys-dexic.

 

He focuses his gaze on Amanda’s LARGE, ERECT NIPPLES that poke through her T-shirt that says, “Yes, this chest belongs to a Zen Buddhist Master”.

 

                                                         IVORY (CONT’D)

                                          Nice T-shirt. 

 

                                                        AMANDA

                                          I try to keep an open mind, you know, because

                                          that’s what Zen Buddhist types do, but I sense

                                          what you really mean is I have a nice chest. 

 

                                                         IVORY

                                         Ah, well, it’s kind of a package deal. Your

                                         really clever T-shirt flows nicely with what

                                         it’s clinging really nicely to. 

 

                                                        AMANDA

                                          Good answer. Originally I thought it was a

                                          clever marketing ploy but now I realize it’s

                                          just another excuse for men to ogle my boobs.

 

                                                         IVORY

                                         Hey, there’s nothing wrong with that.

 

She glares at him. 

 

                                                         IVORY (CONT’D)

                                           Is there?

She SIGHS DRAMATICALLY.

 

                                                          AMANDA

                                           Yes, there is. One of the primary truths of

                                           the Buddha is that the primary cause of

                                           suffering is the attachment to desire. If

                                           one understands the true nature of things,

                                           that there is no separation between the

                                           observer and what is observed, the attachment

                                           to desire disappears. 

 

Ivory nods but he so doesn’t get it. 

 

                                                           IVORY

                                         Okay, I’ll trust you know what you’re talking

                                         about but I still love the idea of large, non-saggy

                                         breasts and you know, the whole hot, sexy, and

                                         willing to share the temple that is their body thing.

 

She nods at the copy of her book.

 

                                                         AMANDA

                                          Would you like a copy of my book? It will help

                                          you free yourself from that kind of thinking. 

 

                                                         IVORY

                                          Sorry but I’m running a little low on funds right now.

 

                                                         AMANDA

                                          That’s okay. This is a freebie.

 

                                                         IVORY

                                           In that case, sure. 

 

She digs BOOK out of backpack, starts to sign the inside front cover. 

 

                                                        IVORY (CONT’D)

                                            How’d a nice, really hot woman like you

                                            become interested in Buddhism?

 

She closes book, "The Sublime Joy of Being Nothing",  hands it to Ivory.

 

                                                        AMANDA

                                            I was theology student at a Christian

                                            college but I partied too much, my grades

                                            were horrible and I just lost interest in

                                            learning anymore about old Jewish men’s

                                            fairy tales. But I was still interested in

                                            spirituality versus religion. All the other

                                            major religions felt forced. Buddhism

                                            seemed the most practical, legitimate, and non divisive. 

 

                                                          IVORY

                                            Interesting. In college, I partied too much

                                            too. But then I kept that theme going after

                                            I graduated and it’s gotten me to where I

                                            am today.                

 

                                                          AMANDA

                                             Which is where?

 

Ivory waves off the question.

 

                                                           IVORY

                                               You don’t want to know. Sorry,

                                               what I really mean is I don’t want to tell you.

 

He starts to leave. Ivory stops, turns back to her.

 

                                                           IVORY (CONT’D)

                                                I know you wrote an entire book on it

                                                but give me the TV Guide recap of what’s

                                                so damn special about Buddhism. 

 

                                                            AMANDA

                                                 No thing. 

 

He stares blankly at her, waiting for more.

 

                                                            IVORY

                                                  Nothing?

 

                                                            AMANDA

                                                  No, not nothing, although it’s

                                                 closely related. Buddhism is all

                                                 about realizing no one or no thing

                                                 has a permanent, fixed identity.

                                                 There is no inner essence that is stable. 

 

                                                               IVORY

                                                 So you wrote a whole book about nothing?

 

                                                               AMANDA (SMILING)

                                                  When you put it like that, ah, well, yes, I

                                                  wrote a book about the nothingness of

                                                  everyone and everything. 

 

                                                                IVORY

                                                   So you got that going for you.

 

Ivory strides toward the nearest alcohol source. He stops, turns around. He points

at her.

 

                                                                  IVORY (CONT’D)

                                                     Hey, thanks for nothing.

 

He laughs drunkenly, leaves the bookstore..

 

 

INT. IVORY BEDROOM - DAY

 

Ivory GROANS to state of semi-consciousness. A LARGE, FLUFFY ORANGE TABBY -- Shaggy II  -- lays on Ivory’s naked chest. Shaggy II  turns his head. The motion causes his whiskers to tickle its owner’s nose. Ivory opens his eyes.

 

He sees how bright the room is, grabs his phone. It’s 10:57 a.m. He bolts up to sitting position. Cat lands on the bed, MEOWS protest. 

 

IVORY (TO SELF)

Shit, why didn’t my alarm go off? 

 

He navigates to alarm clock section. The box next to the alarm time isn’t checked. 

 

IVORY (TO SELF) (CONT’D)

Son of a bitch, how did that get unchecked?

 

He stares down Shaggy II . Cat issues defensive MEOW.

 

IVORY (CONT’D)

I wasn’t accusing you, okay? 

 

Feline seems okay with that. Ivory calls a number.

 

IVORY (CONT’D)

This is Ivory Blackmon. Please let a CSM know I’m going to be a little, well, a lot late, but I’ll be there.

 

Ivory nods, rolls his eyes.

 

IVORY (CONT’D)

Yeah, yeah, I know I’ve done this kind of thing a lot in the past but when I do show up, I’m the best cashier our store has. Okay, thanks, I got to fly. Bye bye.

 

He grabs pair of TAN PANTS and WALMART-BLUE SHIRT from closet, hurriedly puts them on.